WARZONE!
Who will win this battle?
I found myself in a war, deep within my mind.
A battle between light and darkness,
The battle has been going on for so long,
Even before I was conceived.
The Lord wants my heart, the devil wants it too.
My flesh says "Rest, you have tried enough".
My spirit says "No, keep pushing."
Who will win this battle?
I want to do the things I should, the things I know to be right;
But when I try to do these things, in my mind there is a fight.
The spirit is very willing but the flesh is weak.
Who will win this battle?
Everybody keeps saying "follow your heart, trust your instincts."
But, how can I trust my instincts?
Instincts that have been corrupted even before I was formed.
How can I follow this heart of mine that's hard as stone?
This heart that has found its roots in disobedience and lust?
Following my heart will only lead to damnation, what are you saying?
I cannot win, not with this burden of guilt weighing me down.
My six senses betray me,
You'll think they fight on my side, but they don't.
They're on the enemy's side.
"All is fair in love and war", they say
But nothing had ever been fair in this war.
I feel like I'm being torn to pieces and my body is falling apart.
When will it end?
Is there even an end to this?
“Who will win this battle?”
I ask this question over and over again.
Of course, I can't win this battle.
I don't stand a chance against any of these forces.
All I can do is wait.
Wait and surrender for whoever wins the war.
And while laying there on the battlefield,
My mind wounded and sore,
Patiently waiting for the victor to come claim me as His trophy,
I hear that calm voice that has never left me for once, saying;
"Be still, the battle is the Lord's."
I stand up, my strength renewed and I looked around the battlefield,
Holding nothing but my shield and sword;
The battle is brutal and it seems like there's no end,
I see my captain right there in the frontline and I know I'll make it through.
The battle is His.
Honestly, I didn't know what this week's letter was going to be about for a long while, and while I was waiting for inspiration, the phrase “the battle is the Lord's” suddenly came to my head. I think it's just God reassuring me that He has won already. Anxiety cannot win. The voices in my head don't stand a chance. Yayy! I hope that while reading this letter, you felt reassured as I did while writing it.
Siri, play me Olori Ogun by JayMikee!!
In other news, my exam starts today and I'm trying so hard not to panic. The fact that I'm even finding it difficult to stay awake is a very big factor to why I'm panicking. I just know God will help me sha. Remember me in your prayers oh, plix.
I hope that as you walk into this new week, you’ll walk in and with the knowledge that you're not alone in that battle, God is right there in the field of honor, working in your favor. You are helped, always remember that.
Thank you so much for reading.
Bye!❤️